The Brother Cousins

In this post, we’ll continue this month’s series on love in the Christian life, “A New Command, Older Than Time.” Specifically, these points:

• The Cost of Following Jesus.
• The Competing Love of Self.
• Barriers to Love
• A Key Concept for Loving Others

The Cost of Following Jesus:

Let’s open with a statement from Jesus:

Luke 14:26-32 ESV  “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple.  27  Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple.  28  For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it?  29  Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him,  30  saying, ‘This man began to build and was not able to finish.’  31  Or what king, going out to encounter another king in war, will not sit down first and deliberate whether he is able with ten thousand to meet him who comes against him with twenty thousand?  32  And if not, while the other is yet a great way off, he sends a delegation and asks for terms of peace.  

Not long ago, my wife Laura and I built a house. Before we did, we sat down and counted the cost to see if we could afford what we wanted. As a result, we made some changes to the plan! So, what’s the cost of following Jesus?

Luke 14:33 ESV So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple.

Choosing to follow Jesus could cost you literally everything. History tells us that for many Christians, it has. Is that too much?

As Jeffrey mentioned in Episode 001, the Greatest Command from Jesus in Mark 12:30 is to love God with all our heart, soul, mind and strength. This leaves no aspect of our being which isn’t directed to loving God. Consider these questions:

• Can you really say that you love God with ALL your heart?
• Is there anything you are holding back from God?
• If so, what is it? And what’s your reason for doing so?

Competing Love of Self

I believe the reason we don’t give God the devotion he asks for is because we are too in love with ourselves. Listen to Paul’s warning to Timothy about a selfish kind of people:

2 Timothy 3:1-4 ESV  But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty.  2  For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy,  3  heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good,  4  treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God…

Let’s explore his verse. We find some interesting characteristics mentioned:

• Love of self (phil-autos)
• Love of money (phil-arguros; literally, a lover of silver)
• Heartless/Without natural affection (a-storgi; lacking familial affection)
• Love of pleasure (phile-donos; the root where we get the word “Hedonist”)
• Rather than (more than, KJV) a Lover of God (philo-theos)

So the picture we got is one who is preoccupied with self, worships money, fails to love family, and seeks pleasure instead of God.

Listen to Paul’s antidote:

2 Timothy 3:10 ESV  You, however, have followed my teaching, my conduct, my aim in life, my faith, my patience, my love, my steadfastness…

• Paul’s answer to utter selfishness was love; however, not just any love: agape love.
• It’s not a sin to care for ourselves, use money, or enjoy wholesome pleasures; however, all of these affections must be subordinate to an all-consuming love for God.

Barriers to Loving Others

So, what about our barriers to loving others? If a love of self competes with our love for God, it competes even harder against our love for other people. And sometimes those other people appear to pose a threat to our own happiness and satisfaction, which is why we have this admonition from James:

James 3:13-17 ESV  Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom.  14  But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth.  15  This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic.  16  For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice.  17  But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere.

Two of my children are very close in age, and that means they compete for EVERYTHING. My wife and I often joke that they are perfect angels as long as we can keep them apart! The point is that they love each other just fine, until their selfish natures compete with each other. Sadly, it’s the same with adults. We get along just fine until another person’s desires compete with our own. And this failure to exercise basic love for others results in a host of evils committed against one another. Let’s remember that this influence is from Hell, not from Christ.

A Key Concept for Loving Others

So do you find yourself struggling to love others like God’s Word demands? As we wrap up, let’s look at an example of how the First Century Christians in Macedonia ordered and demonstrated their love—to the glory of Christ.

2 Corinthians 8:1-5 ESV  We want you to know, brothers, about the grace of God that has been given among the churches of Macedonia,  2  for in a severe test of affliction, their abundance of joy and their extreme poverty have overflowed in a wealth of generosity on their part.  3  For they gave according to their means, as I can testify, and beyond their means, of their own accord,  4  begging us earnestly for the favor of taking part in the relief of the saints—  5  and this, not as we expected, but they gave themselves first to the Lord and then by the will of God to us.

Many of us likely give of our surplus to churches and other causes we believe in. The churches in Macedonia set the bar for generosity.

They gave beyond their means; meaning, they gave till it cost them something. Before they could give themselves to their brethren, they FIRST gave selves to the Lord and THEN to their brethren (by the will of God). If we want to love our neighbor like they did, we need to first love God like they did. 

2 Corinthians 8:9 ESV  For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though he was rich, yet for your sake he became poor, so that you by his poverty might become rich.

Q: What more does Jesus Christ have to do for you so you will give Him your whole heart?

More money? Bigger house? Greater influence on social media? That dream job? If we are honest with ourselves, we realize that Jesus has done all that we could ask and more already, and that it’s our turn to sacrifice.

If you like what you are reading, please check out this corresponding episode of the Brother Cousins podcast: https://anchor.fm/dashboard/episode/e17jjp2